The house has been emptied, barr the kitchen. I ran out of puff, and found that each day I spent there rendered me a bit more emotional and tired. I have moved everything apart from furniture, into the garage for my sister and her family to take, cleaned the house, hubby tidied the garden, and thats it. Done. House is now on the market. The day the agent came to take the photos, he found 3 ducks sat on the lawn. Odd, but for me very apt! They stayed there all day apparently and now appear in the house details.
I had some very good cries whilst clearing out the house, still plenty of tears left in me, but at least I just let go and went with the flow so to speak. I am feeling emotionally drained and battered and my family is getting used to the sudden flow of tears at odd times. I also feel emotionally vulnerable. Hubby and I had a spat earlier, one which I would have joined in with gusto normally, but had me sobbing almost immediately. Spoilt everyones fun! I have also lost the ability to enjoy myself I think. I can't seem to find the joy in anything at the moment and it upsets me greatly. I am sure it will pass in time, but it doesn't help.
I bumped into Ed today in Tesco and said to him that I want to blog, but the words just won't come. I desperately want to get my feelings out, but the time is possibly not right, and they remain firmly locked away. That sucks.
And that brings me to the end. I tried and on this occasion didn't succeed to let it all out. Next time maybe ..............
